The REAL Epilogue to Breaking Dawn
by Intermission
Summary: This is for all of you who were not satisfied with BD and wished for a different ending. .:Edward's POV:.


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**Epilogue: Reality**

_Edward_

By Alellie

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**Disclaimer: **I am not Stephenie Meyer…and after reading BD, I am so glad I'm not. Though, I wish to still own Edward…sigh don't we all?

**Starting A/N: **OK, this was purely written out as an incentive to vent off my anger…disappointment with BD, yadda yadda. Seriously, that book made me…grr. I really can't find the words to describe it. I'm just going to say that the ending was in Eclipse. I'll probably write a fanfic later, titled, "What Should Have Happened in Breaking Dawn" as a remake of the poor story Mrs. Meyer has bestowed us with. Whatever, just read this.

**Warning: **Spoilers ahead for those of you who haven't read Breaking Dawn, which I highly suggest you borrow from the library rather than buying it from a bookstore.

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My mind willed my legs to move swifter, knowing that Bella's state would grow worse as the seconds passed.

Just a minute ago, I'd been leeringly stalking a herd of deer, when suddenly a vision from Alice had replaced my intent.

Bella was clearly in trouble.

What kind, I do not know. All I understand is that my beloved seemed disgruntled, clearly uncomforted with any circumstance on what was happening to her. I did not wait for Alice to explain the situation; my instincts to protect Bella pushed me to head on back to the mansion.

It didn't take long before I saw a glimpse of the house.

I barged in the entry, only to meet with my mother, who seemed a bit displeased with my entrance. I looked at the destroyed doors and smiled sheepishly. Her stern demeanor seemed to falter, but the glare from her eyes never left her face.

My grin dropped when Bella's state flashed repeatedly in my mind.

"Where's Bella?" Esme looked at me hesitantly. Her thoughts showed that she was upstairs in my bedroom with my two brothers. My adopted mother's mind illustrated nothing else besides her whereabouts.

"Err…so sorry about the door…Mom." I gave her a crooked grin before I set off, and I didn't have to have mind-reading abilities to know that I've caught her. Esme just met my answer with a roll of her eyes and a smile.

"I'll let it pass this one time, Edward."

Running as carefully and as quickly as I could, I entered my room more loudly than I would have intended.

What I saw was something I would not have expected.

Jasper and Emmett were both sprawled on the ground, laughing senselessly, while my only beloved sat on our bed, groaning. I ignored my brothers for now, and threw my arms around her.

She wasn't crying, but I knew that there was something bothering her. Her face was covered with her hands, as if she were horribly mortified.

"Bella, are you alright?" I voiced my concern.

She didn't answer, but only moaned louder, "Edward…"

"What's wrong? Are you hurt?" I was beginning to get frustrated with the fact that my brothers were laughing while my Bella was in pain.

Their thoughts were slightly jumbled, considering that they were both undergoing a massive laughing fit. I personally didn't know what was so funny and why weren't they doing anything to help ease Bella.

All I could see in their heads were slightly disoriented images of feathers and a lake serpent. My head cocked in confusion, and wondered if Bella was truly in pain. My brothers would have reacted differently if she really were hurting.

I accented my worry again, and this time she responded, "Oh! E-Edward…it w-was sooo…_horrible_…It seemed so real…"

I instinctively ran my hands through her soft locks, while muttering reassurances.

Humming her lullaby, and whispering, "Shh…shh…it's okay. It's okay." seemed to do the trick, and Bella stopped shuddering. Her beautiful face turned up to look at me, and I offered her her favorite smile.

She grinned, but it didn't quite meet up to her eyes as she looked, annoyed, at Emmett and Jasper, who were finally beginning to compose themselves.

"Man…it's been a long time since I laughed that hard…"

"I know…Oh. God, I know, right?" They offered themselves another laugh, and I blocked their thoughts from reaching my mind any further. Instead, I checked Bella's physical state and saw that she was perfectly healthy.

What had happened?

Finally, Emmett noticed my presence. "Oh, Eddie! We didn't notice you here! Aren't you supposed to be hunting?"

"Well, Alice had a vision about Bella that made me want to see how she was in person. I can see that she is fine, now, but I am still slightly confused to what has caused her discomfort." Then, I added, "Oh, yes, Emmett, call me that nickname again, and I swear I will tell Rosalie about that…unfortunate incident in Rio."

A sly smile spread across my face as I heard Emmett's gulp and Rosalie's yell of "What?! What is he talking about, Emmett Cullen?!" from downstairs. Jasper only snickered.

It took a second before Emmett could finally regain back his stride. With a smirk, he chided, "No need to lose your temper, Eddi—Edward. Must be hard on you bottling up your emotions like that. What with all that anger and…_sexual _tension, I wouldn't be surprised if you snapped the headboard of the bed now."

At this, Jasper and Emmett shared another peal of laughter, and my Bella grimaced. I tried to enter their minds, but their thoughts were distracting me with the lyrics of the horrid rap songs the teenagers these days listened to. My teeth clenched together, producing a metallic sound that even Bella's human ears could hear.

"What is going on?" I asked with gritted teeth.

"It's nothing, Edward. Go back to your hunt. It was just a nightm—err, dream that bothered me. I'm alright." My love answered for the first time.

"Dream?" I asked flatly, and Bella only nodded, not wanting to go to discussion about it any further.

"Hey, Edward, I was thinking about getting a dog. Do you think the name 'Renesmee' fits?"

They laughed again, and my love cringed at the mention of the name. Renesmee? I personally thought of it to have sounded like a rice porridge brand, for some otherworldly reason. But I didn't really care about my brother's meaningless teasing; knowing that mentions of what they said brought Bella to contort her face into distaste.

Not knowing about the nightmare she had experienced, the best thing I could do was to silence Jasper and Emmett.

I had tried to do it, but all I received were wisecracks about how "my son and my mongrel brother were these days" or whether or not "I would name a child after a lake demon".

I didn't understand any of it, and their thoughts only repulsed me, considering that they were still singing along to the beats of an unknown singer that I did not wish to know about.

Finally, after some unknown jokes that I did not understand, they finally stopped, right before my temper got the best of me.

"Are you two morons finished?" my voice held nothing but irritation. Bella had all but ignored the two, and concentrated on getting back to sleep.

Their laughter wore off, and they stopped. "Okay, okay. I guess that's enough teasing for Bella and Edward today. We'll stop. We'll stop."

Emmett held out his hands in the air as a "we come in peace" sign. Jasper just gave me a smirk, which I wished to wipe of off his face.

"We'll go now…but, seriously, can you blame us? What Bella told us was probably the most hysterical thing we've ever heard."

Jasper sniggered as I growled at Emmett. They finally left, but not before giving me a goofy grin and a sly smirk.

I sighed in relief, and positioned my love to my bed. Her face was completely content, and all that mattered was that she was alright.

All was well.

.

Until Emmett came right back in.

I suppressed a growl, and looked at him squarely. "What do you want now, Emmett?"

He answered with a smile. "Oh, nothing…just forgot to give you this. I think you might find it useful."

He held out some rectangular pieces of paper while he added, "Just think of it as my early wedding gift for your _honeymoon_."

I plunged the papers into my pocket, and shooed him away, "Alright…whatever. Just leave."

Emmett complied and left with another grin.

A minute passed and my curiosity got the best of me. I took the slightly crumpled pieces of paper, and read the description. They were coupons, bought from the furniture store in Port Angeles.

As I read the offer, I said out loud, "What on Earth would I use '50 percent off pillows' for?"

Emmett only sniggered downstairs.

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**Ending A/N: **Okay, I finally finished this. And, again, I don't care if you get the jokes or not (if not, read the honeymoon chapter)…I don't even think people are gonna read this…but, seriously, Breaking Dawn (to me) was sooo disappointing that I had to write something about it. Almost everybody wrote a review about it, so well, I wrote a review…in a story.

So, here's my really short review: I didn't like it.

Tada, that's it. I don't want to go in long descriptions as to why, considering that there are a lot of authors who've done that by now.

If you liked it, good for you.

If you didn't like it, welcome to the club.

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